CINEMA

Click images to enlarge
Twisters –– Schlocknado.
The Crumb Catcher –– Crumby.
The Abandon –– Leave it or not.
Clear Cut –– The most happy feller.
Oddity –– Weird d’oh!
Widow Cliquot –– Vin blank.
Before Dawn –– In the dark.
Crossing –– Off my list.
Lullaby –– Snooze bah.
Creatura –– Discomforts.
Great Absence –– Gone but forgotten.
You Have to Come and See It –– Invitation to the dunce.
The Punishment –– Is it ever.
Join or Die –– Group grope.
Hollywoodgate –– Taliban width.
Modernism, Inc.: The Eliot Noyes Design Story –– Noyes canceling.

Fly Me to the Moon –– Moon schmuck.
Longlegs –– Duddy Longlegs.
Sing Sing –– Sink sink.
Lumina –– Glow energy.
National Anthem –– Yippee, I gay.
The Inheritance –– Bad heir day.
Dandelion –– Whine.
Johnny Puff: Secret Mission –– Cuckoo Puff.
Touch –– Hands off.
The Convert –– Hail Maori play.
Sisi –– Non, Non!
Sorry/Not Sorry –– Really sorry.
Eno –– Uh, no.
Made in England: The Films of Powell and Pressburger –– I know why I’m going.
America’s Burning –– Ember alert.
Skywalkers –– Work for scale.

Beverly Hills Cop: Axel F –– Broken Axel.
Despicable Me 4 –– Gru cold.
Maxxxine –– Smut and chaff.
Boneyard –– Grave admissions.
Mother, Couch –– Sofa’s choice.
The Secret Art of Human Flight –– Never gets off the ground.
Sound of Hope: The Story of Possum Trot –– Trot in hell.
Murder Company –– Droop movements.
Dead Whisper –– Rasp bury.
The Nature of Love –– Amour, then a little.
A Man of Reason –– No figure.

Horizon: An American Saga-Chapter 1 –– Flat lines.
A Quiet Place: Day One –– Utter nonsense.
Daddio –– Fare beater.
Scream Therapy –– Bellow average.
Last Summer –– Boy doy.
A Sacrifice –– Of 100 minutes.
Family Portrait –– Snap draggin’.
The Vourdalak –– Cold brood.
Chronicles of a Wandering Saint –– Miracle whipped.
Music –– That beat’s all.
June Zero –– Concentration cramp.
Kalki 2898 AD –– Kaka.
The Conqueror: Hollywood Fallout –– Genghis con.
How to Come Alive with Norman Mailer –– The naked and the dud.
Something to Stand For with Mike Rowe –– I won’t stand for it.
Revival 69: The Concert that Rocked the World –– Fest and loose.

The Bikeriders –– Hog tired.
Kinds of Kindness –– Three beat.
Thelma –– And low wheezy.
The Exorcism –– Repossessed.
Janet Planet –– Kid pro quo.
Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person –– Vampirical evidence.
Blackwater Lane –– Backwater lame.
The Devil’s Bath –– Bath assaults.
Fancy Dance –– Dippy toes.
The Speedway Murders –– Track balls.
Chestnut –– Merde.
Green Border –– Refugeez!
Hummingbirds –– Wing meh.
What Remains –– What Remains?
She Rises Up – With my gorge.
Copa 71 –– D Cup.
Jeff McFetridge: Drawing a Life –– Mental pictures.

Inside Out 2 –– Emotion sickness.
Firebrand –– Parr for the coarse.
Treasure –– Bury it.
Ghostlight –– Flicker license.
Fresh Kills –– Staten Island bury.
Bad Behaviour –– Cult de sac.
Ride –– Buck off.
Reverse the Curse –– You screw.
Cora Bora –– Borer snorer.
Latency –– Blatency.
Just the Two of Us –– Double downer.
Ultraman: Rising –– Silly in the extreme.
The Grab –– Doesn’t.
Queendom –– Moscow mewl.
Scab Vendor: Confessions of a Tattoo Artist –– Tat ill tale.

Bad Boys: Ride or Die –– Drive shaft.
The Watchers –– Wait, Watchers.
Tuesday –– Feather dusted.
I Used to Be Funny –– Eons ago?
Trim Season –– Trim movie.
Longing –– For the end credits.
Late Bloomers –– Dies on the vyin’.
Kill Your Lover –– Clinch mob.
Someday We’ll Tell Each Other Everything –– Fool disclosure.
This Closeness –– Near miss.
Cottontail –– Rabbit hole.
Banel & Adama –– Banal & Adama.
Animalia –– Moroccan lather.
School of Magical Animals 2 –– Ruff magic.
Jesus Thirsts: The Miracle of the Eucharist –– Thirst tripe.
Frank Miller: American Genius –– No question mark?

In A Violent Nature –– Life hacks.
Ezra –– Light as a father.
Young Woman and the Sea –– Broad strokes.
The Dead Don’t Hurt –– Ache necessarily so.
What You Wish For –– Covet operation.
Summer Camp –– Harpy campers.
Deer Camp ’86 –– The buck stops here.
Backspot –– Cheer bleeder.
Guy Friends –– Male pickup.
Big Boys –– Bear cubs.
Shadow Land –– Voight where prohibited.
Handling the Undead –– Bier chaser.
20,000 Species of Bees –– Sting to sleep.
Haikyu!! The Dumpster Battle –– LowIQ!!
Flipside –– B-side itself.
Hidden Master: The Legacy of George Platt Lynes –– Shot cock.
Rowdy Girl –– Vegged out.

Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga –– The road worrier.
The Garfield Movie –– Cat’s can.
Hitman –– Knock it off.
Solo –– So slow.
Sight –– Unseen.
I Don’t Know Who You Are –– And I don’t care.
Songs of Earth –– Norse opera.
Kidnapped: The Abduction of Edgardo Mortara –– Abduct work.
Queen of the Deuce –– Porn and bread.
Maestra –– Baton rouged.
Invisible Nation –– Tsai ops.

IF –– fy.
Back to Black –– Whine house.
Babes –– In bombs.
I Saw the TV Glow –– Flickery-split.
You Can’t Run Forever –– Halter stops.
Faceless After Dark –– The invisible mien.
The American –– Moscow’s bullshit ballet.
Coma –– I feel you.
In Our Day –– Lying share.
The Blue Angels –– Recruitidy.
Taking Venice –– Paint threshold.
Laugh Proud –– Queer not amused.

Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes –– Apey bio.
Poolman –– Shallow end.
Not Another Church Movie –– Altar egos.
Force of Nature: The Dry 2 –– Sere sage and soothsayer.
The Last Stop in Yuma County –– Yumaless.
The Image of You –– The image of eww!
Lazareth –– Didn’t get rise out of me.
East Bay –– Bay: don’t watch.
Aisha –– Niger nor.
A Prince ––Fretty Prince.
Stay With Us –– Anal retention.
Gasoline Rainbow –– Not too slick.
Triple 2 –– Dive bomb.

The Fall Guy –– Stunt dumbbell.
Unfrosted –– Plop tart.
Wild Cat –– Flannery will get you nowhere.
New Life –– No life.
Something in the Water –– Flotsam, dearie.
Tarot –– Below deck.
Chief of Station –– CIA moldy.
Lost Soulz –– Soulz sapping.
Dragonkeeper –– Scaly movie.
Evil Does Not Exist –– Mediocrity sure do.
Slow –– Unbelievably.
Kitty the Killer –– Kitty hack.
Adiós Buenos Aires –– Tango and crash.
Catching Fire: The Story of Anita Wallenberg –– Anita Hell.
Who Is Stan Smith –– Oh!

Challengers –– Racket ruin.
Boy Kills World –– Deaf, dumb and grind.
Humane –– To err is Humane.
Breathe –– Lung shot.
Nowhere Special –– Hocus locus.
Unsung Hero –– Faith plant.
The Feeling That the Time for Doing Something Has Passed –– Too late highway.
The Big Bend –– Over.
Cash Out –– Chips and dip.
Cinderella’s Revenge –– Crass slipper.
Pratfall –– Prat falls.
Dancing Village: The Curse Begins –– Ass take two-step.
Poetry –– Doesn’t get much verse.
I Am Gitmo –– Islamofacetious.
Slam –– Dunce.
Beyond the Raging Sea –– Row v. wave.
Uncropped –– Comes a cropper.

Abigail –– Kid snapped.
The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare –– Combat poots.
Sasquatch Sunset –– Pigfoot.
Rebel Moon: Part Two - The Scargiver –– Leaves a mock.
Blood for Dust –– Sucks dry.
Villains Incorporated –– Baddie odor.
Hard Miles –– Cycle killer.
We Grown Now –– A growner.
Stress Positions –– Loud and queer.
The Three Musketeers: Part II - Milady –– Malady duh Winter.
Dusk for a Hitman –– Crepuscular dystrophy.
Egoist –– Blows hard.
Oasis –– Mirage of convenience.
The Coffee Table –– Café con lechy.
Irena’s Vow –– Nuts and oaths.
Spy x Family Code: White –– White whacker.

Civil War –- Civil liability.
Arcadian –– Penny Arcadian.
Sweet Dreams –– Are made of diss.
Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead –– Tell her movie is.
Sting –– eroo.
LaRoy, Texas –– LaRoy retches.
The Long Game –– Caddie slack.
Omen –– Bad Omen.
Damaged –– Hinky dinky doo.
The Absence of Eden –– Paradise sloshed.
Unsinkable –– Float and eddy.
A Forgotten Man –– Stuck in neutral.
In Flames –– Burns my ash.
Sweet Dreams –– Are made of dips.
Lost Angel: The Genius of Judee Sill –– Silly.
Resistance: They Fought Back –– Resistable.

TOP

STATUE OF LIMITATIONS 2024

Best Picture Nominees:

American Fiction –– Doesn’t play well with authors.
Anatomy of a Fall –– Splatitudes.
Barbie –– Pink aie!
The Holdovers –– Teacher’s pit.
Killers of the Flower Moon –– Osage can you see.
Maestro –– Baton death march.
Oppenheimer –– A-bombinable.
Past Lives –– Pass.
Poor Things –– That would be the audience.
The Zone of Interest –– Is elsewhere.

Monkey Man –– Ape shit.
The First Omen –– Nix nix nix.
Coupe de Chance –– Fat Chance.
Parachute –– Hits the sulk.
The People’s Joker –– Assy DC.
The Greatest Hits –– Humdumb.
Model House –– Strike a poser.
The Old Oak –– Acorny.
A Bit of Light –– Ray iota.
The Beast –– Beast wacks.
Housekeeping for Beginners –– A mess.
Chicken for Linda! –– Poule cue.
Epic Tales –– Mouse curser.
Girls State –– The obvious.
Kim’s Video –– Rental wreck.

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire –– Rock‘em sock ‘em reboot.
In the Land of Saints and Sinners –– Erin go broke.
Wicked Little Letters –– Nothing to post about.
The Listener –– I’m all jeers.
Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey 2 –– Sticky in the mud.
Lousy Carter –– Garbage Carter.
Asphalt City –– Blockosphere.
With Love and a Major Organ –– Not the brain.
Monster Mash –– Sour Mash.
Bag of Lies –– Sack of shit.
DogMan –– Arful.
A Cat’s Life –– Chat itself.
La Chimera –– Fleeting enema.
Karaoke –– Dirty sync.
A Fragile Flower –– Petal harder.
Hate to Love: Nickelback –– Flip the coinage.

Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire –– Ghost cold turkey.
The Beautiful Game –– Pitch poor.
Late Night With the Devil –– Heathenly host.
Immaculate –– Pure nonsense.
Problemista –– Snag pit.
Femme –– Drag and bone.
Kumiko the Treasure Hunter –– Dug-doo.
Sleeping Dogs –– Plays dead.
Riddle of Fire –– Riddle of the stinks.
Peter Five Eight –– Lost in Spacey.
Limbo –– A void like the plague.
William Shatner: You Can Call Me Bill –– Bill and kook.
Carol Doda Topless at the Condor –– Mammary glance.
Art Talent Show –– Art talent no.

Love Lies Bleeding –– Butch casualty.
One Life –– Refugee wiz.
Knox Goes Down –– Hard Knox.
Shirley –– Chisolm trails.
Arthur the King –– Clear as mutt.
The American Society of Magical Negroes –– Black in back.
Irish Wish –– Téigh trasna ort féin!
Snack Shack –– Snicker Snack.
The Prank –– Prank amateur.
French Girl –– Late fille.
Club Zero –– Jack of clubs.
Uproar –– Whimper take all.
The Animal Kingdom –– Animauxtronic.
Exhuma –– Ex-humor.
Much Ado About Dying –– Cryptic.
Do Not Expect Too Much from the End of the World –– Or this film.
The Shadowless Tower –– Tower record.
Remembering Gene Wilder –– Wilder and woolly.
Ryuichi Sakamoto: Opus –– ‘Opeless.

Kung Fu Panda 4 –– Po dunk.
Cabrini –– Mother bored.
American Dreamer –– Home inversion.
5lbs of Pressure –– 3 ozs. of script.
Imaginary –– Dream job.
Night Shift –– Alt Shift.
Accidental Texan –– Tex arcana.
The Piper –– Peed Piper.
Glitter & Doom –– Clatter & dumb.
Yolo –– Peril.
Space: The Longest Goodbye –– Mars obiter.
High & Low - John Galliano –– Low & lower.

Dune: Part Two –– Arid, extras dry.
Rose’s War –– Makes a colleen break.
Before I Change My Mind –– Gendered helpless.
Outlaw Posse –– What’s up, posse cat?
Amelia’s Children –– Twin shitties.
Asleep in My Palm –– Clap trap.
Silver Haze –– Gabby Haze.
Lost Ladies –– Lose Ladies.

Drive-Away Dolls –– Waffle Coen.
Ordinary Angels –– Liver saps.
Red Right Hand –– Palms away.
Cold Meat –– Freeze willy.
Stopmotion –– Stopmovie.
Parallel –– Lines never meet.
Drugstore June –– Has script problems.
Demon Slayer: Kimetsu no Yaiba — To the Hashira Training –– A manga the worst.
Seagrass –– Water pretension.
Io Capitano –– Feud desert.
Golden Years –– Grey poop on.
Terezin –– Booty camp.
About Dry Grasses –– And gasses.
Kiss the Future –– Bono rue.
Mad Props –– Set’s maniacs.
Veselka: The Rainbow on the Corner at the Center of the World –– Borscht, bolt.

Madame Web –– Flat spin.
Bob Marley: One Love –– A Rasta development.
Bleeding Love –– Bleeding awful.
Adam the First –– Rib-tickler.
Land of Bad –– Country and wastin’.
Players –– Game shit match.
Monolith –– Slab happy.
No Way Up –– Downer.
Lights Out –– Dim bubs.
Altered Reality –– Deeply fake.
Gloria Gaynor: I Will Survive –– Gloria loser.
Hate to Love –– You’ll want your nickel back.
God & Country –– Raspberry pious.
Onlookers –– Laos ebb.

Lisa Frankenstein –– Parts and re-creation.
Out of Darkness –– But not dorkness.
Drift –– Away.
Marmalade –– Sticky.
Molli and Max in the Future –– Molli curdle.
Lola –– Loller.
Air Force One Down –– Knows dive.
Willie and Me –– Half Nelson.
The Private Eye –– Low tec.
Peppa’s Cinema Party –– Ghost Peppa.
Cobweb –– Stranded.
The Monk and the Gun –– Felonious Monk.
Float –– In the bowl.
Here –– I'm outta Here.
Ennio –– More o’ corny.

Argylle –– Sucks.
How to Have Sex –– Entry level job.
Fitting In –– Discharge account.
Scrambled Eggs –– Futility clinic.
Suncoast –– Sick notes.
Somewhere Quiet –– Hush pulpy.
Calamity Jane –– Glum slinger.
Departing Seniors –– Prom puree.
The Jungle Bunch: Operation Meltdown –– Puddle pushers.
The Promised Land –– Epic flail.
Skin Deep –– Swap meat.
Disco Boy –– Niger nor.
She Is Conann –– The borebarian.
Dario Argento Panico –– Prince of wails.
Bushman –– Bushed, man.

Sometimes I Think About Dying –– Like 15 minutes into this.
Hundreds of Beavers –– Not worth a dam.
Miller’s Girl –– Miller’s glossing.
The Seeding –– Seedy.
American Star –– Wrecking cruise.
Cold Copy –– Faked news.
Junction –– Junk. Shun.
Totém –– Low meh on it.
Mambar Pierrette –– Sew what?
Alienoid: Return to the Future –– Alien void.
State Organs –– Organs grinder.
The ‘Vous: A Memphis Story –– BBQ sores.

Founders Day –– Slash man standing.
I.S.S. –– H.I.S.S.
Which Brings Me to You –– Fling poop.
Wanted Man –– Got beast.
Bring Him to Me –– Fraud pick-up.
Sunrise –– Blood vassal.
Cult Killer –– Cult de suck.
Double Down South –– Cue and eh?
The Hunted –– Hasn’t a preyer.
The Breaking Ice –– Crystal knocked.
Inside the Yellow Cocoon Shell –– Naminal.
Time Still Turns the Pages –– From bad to verso.
Passing: In the Shadow of Everest –– Pasang strange.
The Arc of Oblivion –– Arc de défaite.

Mean Girls –– Snark citing.
The Beekeeper –– Honey don't.
Lift –– Off.
The Book of Clarence –– Low Clarence.
Destroy All Neighbors –– Next dork.
T.I.M. –– D.I.M.
The Night They Came Home –– Posse galore.
Laced –– Unlaced.
Driving Madeleine –– Taxi crab.
The Settlers –– Settle sore.
Inshallah a Boy –– Err Jordan.
Bye Bye Tiberias –– Abbass-ackwards.

Night Swim –– Dip shit.
Self Reliance –– Rely bad.
The Bricklayer –– Drops a load.
He Went That Way –– No direction honed.
Weak Layers –– Snow adrift.
American Star –– Points blank.
The Painter –– Drips and drubs.
You Can’t Stay Here –– If this is playing.
Some Other Woman –– Bent her.
The Bastard Sons –– Bro beating.
Rewind –– Dirty spool.
Mayhem! –– No, Mayhem.